GAME CLEAR No. 297 -- Punch-Out!! (1984)

Punch-Out!! (1984, Arcade)

Developer: Nintendo R&D3
Publisher: Nintendo
Clear Port: Arcade Archives: Punch-Out!! (2018, Switch)
Port Developer: HAMSTER
Port Publisher: HAMSTER
Clear Version: Switch
Clear Platform: Switch 2
Clear Date: 5/20/26

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Why should I care?
Nintendo’s iconic boxing series may be better remembered by most for its NES entry, but this version looks sharp and feels sharp too.

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Mr. Sandman, let’s meet in the ring 🎶

I recently saw Arcade Archives described as “the best thing happening in video games right now,” and it’s kind of hard to disagree. Hamster has been cranking out solid, competent emulation products for years with no stopping in sight. It is probably this exact hustle to which we owe the fact that any of Nintendo’s arcade games exist on Switch at all. Sure, it might’ve been cool if classic titles like Donkey Kong or indeed Punch-Out!! had been given a fancier, M2-style release, but that they are present at all is pretty cool. Besides, these ACA releases are at least less spartan than the rather pathetic Nintendo Switch Online emulator apps. It’s a real treat that the underplayed arcade debut of Nintendo’s silly boxing franchise is an easy eight-buck eShop download. The game rules.

Although this 1984 release was apparently the best-performing arcade title of its year of release and the excellent 2009 Wii title of the same name sold over a million copies, the 1987 NES version seems to have the broadest cultural reach (full disclosure: I am basing that mostly on vibes). That’s not without good reason — the console version is excellent. It features a much broader cast of opponents, a fuller soundtrack, and the lovable Doc Louis. Still, the arcade original established the formula, and some of its idiosyncratic features make it a treat to enjoy with a retrospective eye.

The game features two primary gimmicks innovations. The cabinet of Punch-Out!! holds two monitors (an early example of Nintendo’s dual-screen obsession). This allowed the designers to offload all HUD/informational stuff onto the top screen while the action took place below. Additionally, the advanced chips of the arcade platform allow for sprite scaling. This meant opposing boxers could bob and weave back and forth realistically without requiring painstaking redraws by some artist at from Nintendo that Wikipedia tells me was named “Shigeru Miyamoto.”

That is to say, Punch-Out!! produced some pretty mind-boggling effects. All the better for displaying the big, ugly, goofy mugs of the opponents you’ll face on the circuit of the World Video Boxing Association. You assume control of an unnamed, green-haired boxer (generally retroactively referred to as Little Mac, the name applied to him on NES) fresh on the scene. He’s rendered as a wireframe so that the beautiful spritework of the opponent is visible through him. Portraits of the two fighters are also presented on the top monitor like the old painted posters that used to advertise big bouts. Below the portraits are the health bars of each fighter. Before each fight, a digitized voice announces the opponent as he approaches Mac. It has all the trappings of boxing you could possibly expect from a game of its vintage.

Not content to just look and good, the game plays wonderfully as well, although it takes a bit of getting used to if you’re coming from the later games. The controls are simple. Pressing up or down moves your gloves to the relevant position defensively. Pressing a left or right punch button throws a punch at either the face or the abdomen depending on the position of your gloves (the announcer calls out each punch as either “LEFT”, “RIGHT”, or “BODY BLOW” in a way that will become seared into your brain). You can dodge your opponents blows by pressing the joystick (or d-pad, as the case may be) left or right.

Generally, a winning strategy is to throw punches where your opponent’s gloves are not. Landing consecutive blows without being hit will charge your KO meter, which allows you to throw powerful right hooks and uppercuts, which dramatically increase the chance of a knockout when you exhaust the opponent’s stamina meter.

Your opponent is allowed to punch you too, of course. Each boxer has a few standard punches they throw. Their eyes glow yellow when they are about to strike, and the exact type of punch they are about to throw typically has at least some amount of telegraphing as well. Additionally, a few of them have devastating special moves they unleash at particular times in the round. You must master avoiding or countering these to stand a chance. This is some of the most fun shit to do in the game, too, and in some ways makes it feel like a rhythm game rather than a sports sim. Putting Bald Bull on the mat in a single well-timed blow during his charge attack is classic Punch-Out!! stuff. So satisfying.

Memorize the tendencies of all six fighters, and you’ll find yourself the belt-holder of the World Video Boxing Association in no time. This game is dramatically less difficult than the NES title. I managed to get through it in just a couple days of learning its ins and outs. Now, as soon as you become the champ, you immediately enter title defense mode. Not unlike the same mode in the Wii version, Glass Joe may humble you by whooping your ass immediately. It is funny to see his poster read “World Champion Glass Joe” if you choose to rematch him, though.

In addition to having interesting and unique fighting styles to adapt to, each fighter also sports a lot of character and personality. The aforementioned Glass Joe is the first opponent and an all-time video game wimp. Naturally, he’s from France. Piston Hurricane is a speedy boxer from Cuba, Bald Bull is an imposing giant from Türkiye, etc. The fighters are generally designed to be caricatures of their regions, but there are generally fewer problematic pugilists in this game than subsequent ones (although I, uhh, think Kid Quick’s portrait is perhaps a bit too exaggerated). I think the cultural caricatures throughout the series are generally in good fun and not particularly harmful, but obviously I also doubt they had very many consultants on hand from most of the countries they were lampooning. In any case, Nintendo is cancellable for far worse reasons than this.

Valid criticisms aside, the comical cast of Punch-Out!! is one of its hallmarks and one of the things that makes the series special. This arcade title is the only one in which you can fight against an Italian named Pizza Pasta. That’s gotta be worth anybody’s time.

A final thought here is that although I tend to play these Arcade Archives titles on PlayStation (since it is my primary platform), the Switch is just a great platform for vertically oriented arcade titles. Undocked, the Switch and Switch 2 can be oriented vertically on their kickstands for that true TATE (or dual-monitor) experience. Although I mostly played in handheld mode for convenience and latency reasons, I did play a couple rounds with the screens on top of each other, and it did feel like the most “legit” experience. I’m glad the Switch affords that! Punch-Out!! is a Nintendo title, of course, so it’s not like I could’ve played it elsewhere anyway, but I think the Switch would be the best place to play it regardless.

Pick this game up sometime and see if you have what it takes to become the champ. I’ll be pulling for you.